I hate it.


Doesn’t look too bad from the back right?  I mean, you can tell there’s something a little bit weird about the neckline, but it could just be the way I’m standing, a trick of the light, something non-fatal to the awesomeness of the sweater right?  Wrong.
What the hell sweater!  How can that be your neckline.  What are you from the 80s?  You think it’s cool to be all off-the-shoulder?  Well it’s not the 80s and that’s not cool!  You’re a #$%^*@! sweater.  You should cover me and keep me warm.  Now I know that I altered you heavily, but really all I did was shape the lower body–under the armpits–to bring it around so it can close in the front.  I love this sweater from the armpits down.  The neckline is unacceptable.
Now that I’m finished with this sweater I realize why the neckline is so dumbass.  Because the back is one giant rectangle.  It is in no way shaped to account for the shoulders.  SHOULDERS!  Everyone has them.  It’s dumbass not to account for them.  The sweater needs a yoke.  It is impossible to give this sweater a yoke if you knit the back as written.  I would have to take the sweater all the way back to a giant pile of yarn and completely write my own pattern to create something I wanted to wear.  Le Sigh.
I always forget that even if some pictures look OK, you have to keep in mind that mostly people are posing for pictures and maybe they’re trying really hard to hide the dumbass aspects.  Well with the above photos I have done my best to show you exactly what sucks about this sweater.
The leaves on the sleeves are cute, but they can’t really compensate for the lameness.  I love the yarn, but I don’t think I can stand to frog the whole sweater just to get the yarn back.  Anyone want an ugly sweater?

8 Replies to “I hate it.”

  1. Oh, that’s so depressing! And I can’t even say something like “we always learn from our mistakes” because you didn’t actually make any! Stupid sweater…

    1. It is depressing, but I did that thing where I looked at all the pictures on Ravelry, and even though 98% of them looked awful, I was like…”I bet mine will be like the nice ones.” Stupid overconfidence.

  2. Could you run a ribbon through the neckline? Like Tempting? To cinch it up and make it less square? Could you sew in some darts to make it fit your shoulders? Because the yarn and the back are so awesome. I sympathize with your frustration.

    1. I think the major problem is that the shoulders aren’t shaped. The arms just comes out straight from the body rather than having a shaped cap. I plan on pulling the sweater out back to the back and starting over. Just have to screw up the courage…

  3. That is too bad about the neckline, I really love the rest of it. Maybe you could study a knitting guide a little bit and construct your own neckline and try but only frogging the neckline. Good Luck!

    1. Unfortunately, it’s constructed from side to side (rather than top to bottom) so there’s no way to frog just the top part of the sweater. I’m going to pull it back to the back and start from scratch with just the back lace.

  4. I keep seeing this on Ravelry and doing the same thing of convincing myself that maybe it would work for me, even though I hate almost every shot from the front. Sucks that it won’t work out considering how beautiful the back is, but I’m glad I read this post!

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